HALLOWEEN FEARS
by
Gil Mansergh


A new Halloween tradition has developed over the years. Film critics present lists of "scary-themed" movies for you to watch with some freshly popped corn, refreshing drinks and a handful of candy "borrowed" from someone's trick-or-treat bag. These lists generally fall into three categories:
1. The children's scary movies list featuring classic Disney films about headless horsemen, pirate ghosts, and Donald or Goofy in a haunted house.
2. The classic scary movies list featuring restored black-and-white originals starring monsters, vampires, ghosts and werewolves.
3. The terrified teens scary movies list featuring increasing quantities of blood and gore and psychological torment. (I made a personal decision years ago not to watch or review any movies in this category).
Now this column adds a fourth category to the Halloween Movies lists:
4. The terrors grabbed from the headlines scary movies list.

In case you don't know, we live in scary times and it was not too difficult for me to select the following fear-inducing topics from the various "top ten news stories" posted online. (I've even added the matching categories of phobias).

FEAR OF BAD MEN HARMING OUR CHILDREN (SCELEOPHOBIA): School rooms, bedrooms,the U.S. House of Representatives "spaces where children are supposed to be safe, have become the places of choice for men who prey on the young. A chilling portrait of a sociopath is how Steve Buscemi plays Graham 'The Marietta Mangler' Greene in "Con Air" (1997). After "lifers" hijack the airplane transporting them from one maximum security prison to another, Greene leaves the other escapees to "find something to do." The something turns out to be little girl playing in her trailer park's empty swimming pool. As an added bonus, this movie also has the hijacked plane crash into buildings in a well publicized terrorist target, Las Vegas.

FEAR OF FLYING (AVIOPHOBIA): Boeing research shows that historically one third of all Americans are afraid of flying. In the weeks following 9/11, that percentage nearly doubled to 61%. Movie survivors of plane disasters offer thoughtful insight into Post-Traumatic -Stress-Disorders (PTSD). In "Fearless" (1993), Jeff Bridges and Rosie Perez find contrasting ways to cope and survive. In "Bounce" (2000), Ben Affleck gives away his seat on a plane. When that plane crashes (killing all onboard) alcoholism and an odd form of penance serve as his coping mechanisms.

FEAR OF FLOODS (ANTLOPHOBIA), HURRICANES (LILAPSOPHOBIA), AND TIDAL WAVES (KYMOPHOBIA) CAUSED BY GLOBAL WARMING:
"An Inconvenient Truth," Al Gore's brilliant exposition of the possibly irreversible changes occurring to our home planet, provides a sobering call to action before it's too late. In contrast, "The Day After Tomorrow" (2004) is one of those old-time disaster movies reveling in special effects and individual acts of heroism or futility. Best bets are the scenes of ocean liners sailing through the flooded streets of New York. Even more ridiculous is "Waterworld" (1995) Kevin Costner's swan song of a movie set in a post-glacial future where the most precious commodity on our planet is dry earth itself.

FEAR OF TERRORIST ATTACKS ON BUSES (MOTORPHOBIA), OR SUBWAYS AND TRAINS (SIDERODROPHOBIA): We are constantly being told that terrorists pose a grave new threat to our way of life. Wait a minute. What about the wave of 1919 political assassinations and bombings that forced U.S. Attorney General A. Mitchell Palmer to place J. Edgar Hoover in charge of a special branch of the F.B.I. to arrest, try, and deport terrorists? And it wasn't only in this country that bomb-wielding terrorists threatened the lives of innocent people. Alfred Hitchcock's 1936 film "Sabotage" was based on a 1920 Joseph Conrad novel. In the movie, anarchist Oscar Homolka is assigned to plant a terrorist bomb in London's Picadilly Circus. Since he will be recognized, he builds an Improvised Explosive Device (IED) in a metal film canister and sends a young boy (Desmond Tester) to deliver the package to a specific place by a specific time. But the boy becomes fascinated with things along the way, so he boards a crowded bus to make up for lost time...

FEAR OF ALIENS (XENOPHOBIA) COMBINED WITH FEAR OF A MICROBE-CAUSED PANDEMIC (BACILLOPHOBIA) AND TAINTED VEGETABLES (LACHANOPHOBIA): No sooner did the Asian bird flu subside, when spinach, carrot juice, lettuce and other tainted foodstuffs become deadly. Obvious culprit? The illegal farm worker who didn't wash his hands. A couple of films from the mid-century are perfect here. The first is "The Thing "From Another World" (1951) Howard Hawks' cold-war, sci-fi thriller where the crew of an Alaskan Air Force base must fight off an alien being (James Arness) who turns out to be a gigantic carrot. Then there is the Walt Disney short "Cleanliness Brings Health" (19454) a gringocentric piece of animated advice to "Lávese las manos." (This is part of the "Walt Disney on the Front Lines" DVD.

FEAR OF POLITICIANS (POLITICOPHOBIA) WHO EITHER CAN'T MAKE DECISIONS (DECIDOPHOBIA) OR ARE AFRAID OF CHANGING THEIR MINDS THEIR MINDS (CENTOPHOBIA): Set in the year 2008, "Deterrence" (1999) tests the will power of a President (Kevin Pollack) running for reelection who is suddenly faced with an invasion of Kuwait and the death of several hundred US peacekeepers by Udei Hussein (Saddam's son). Against the advice of his media-conscious Chief-of-Staff (Timothy Hutton) and his savvy National Security Advisor (Sheryl Lee Ralph) our President announces that unless Udei surrenders, he will drop a nuclear bomb on Baghdad. He then gives the city of over five million just "one hour and twenty minutes to evacuate."

Scary stuff eh? Of course you can always have the popcorn, drinks, and candy without watching a movie or the nightly news. "Trick-or-Treat!"

Contact Gil at gilmansergh@comcast.net
Hear Gil's "Cinema Toast" radio show 7:35 Thursday mornings on KRSH-FM, 95.9

Gil Mansergh's Cinema Toast
NEW RELEASES 10/27/06

Catch a Fire (PG-13)
Derek Luke, Tim Robbins, Bonnie Henna,
Directed by: Phillip Noyce
Derek Luke is a regular guy South African until he and his family are brutalized by apartheid and he becomes a revolutionary hero (or terrorist?). The parallels to parts of the world today are obvious and the film fails only in that it remains ambiguous about the disenfranchised using terrorist tactics. I don't understand the rating. There are some R-worthy, gruesome torture scenes in this movie.
2 and 1/2 pieces of violent and ambiguous toast


Running With Scissors (PG-13)
Annette Benning, Brian Cox, Gwyneth Paltrow, Alec Baldwin, Joseph Fiennes, Jill Clayburgh
Directed by: Ryan Murphy
An A-list cast struggles to find order in this series of hit and miss skits that were supposed to be a cohesive whole. The problem is that all of the quirky characters go way past being eccentric into being 100% mentally ill. (at the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
1 and 1/2 pieces of unlikeable toast


One Night With the King (PG)
Tiffany Dupont, Luke Goss, Peter O'Toole, Omar Sharif, John Rhys-Davies
Directed by: Michael O. Sjabel
Nope, it's not Elvis. Based on the Biblical story of Esther, with Persian harem girls, eunuchs, blood-feuds, Jewish tribal history, and Greeks bearing gifts. Other reviewers write that the old-timers (O'Toole, Sharif, Rhys-Davies) steal the show from the pretty youngsters.
not available for preview


Death of a President (NR)
George W. Bush, Becky Ann Baker
Directed by: Gabriel Range
The "censorship" issue (CNN and PBS have refused to air ads for the film) will probably bring more attention than this slipshod production deserves. The premise (Bush assassinated in 2007 and a Muslim fingered as the shooter) is evocative to say the least, but this faux documentary , with its acting school interviewees, blunders and falls flat like one of those repetitive documentaries on the History Channel which shows the same clip 42 times in a 50-minute program.
1 and 1/2 pieces of doesn't work like they want it to toast

Saw III (NR)
Gil doesn't waste his time with slasher films, especially a second sequel


NEW on VIDEO & DVD

Nacho Libre (PG)
Jack Black, Ana DeLa Reguera
Directed by Jared Hess
Box Office: $80,197,993
Trashy, adolescent humor, this concoction of Mexican wrestling, melted cheese and tortillas needs lots of cerveza to appreciate. Lots of cerveza.
2 pieces of refried toast


The Kid and I (PG-13)
Tom Arnold, Joe Mantegna, Henry Winkler, Shannon Elizabeth
Directed by: Penelope Spheeri
Tom Arnold as a washed-up actor saddled with a young costar (Eric Gores--his real life neighbor) who has cerebral palsy. Well-intentioned but uninteresting.
2 pieces of disability of the week toast

Gil Mansergh's Cinema Toast
NEW RELEASES 10/20/06

Flags of Our Fathers (R)
Ryanne Phillippe, Jamie Bell, Jesse Bradford, Adam Beach, Barry Pepper, Paul Walker, Joseph Cross, Benjamin Walker
Directed by: Clint Eastwood
Eastwood has long wanted to direct an epic war movie with all the requisite bomb blasts, airplane swoops, bullet hits, close-ups, cutaways, bloody bodies, missing limbs, and shots of soon-to-be-dead soldiers looking at the photo of their loved ones. He finally got the chance. The only problem is that the battle isn't the most interesting part of this heroic tale. It's that the iconic figure of marines raising the flag on Mount Suribachi was a staged photo-op "WWII hype to make the folks at home feel good "that is so important and relevant. By the way, Eastwood composed the movie's effective music score.
2 and 1/2 pieces of war-is-hell and propoganda-is-too toast


The Prestige (PG-13)
Christian Bale, Hugh Jackman, Scarlett Johansson, Michael Caine, Piper Perabo
Directed by: Christopher Nolan
The same director who loves to tell stories backwards and forwards ("Memento," and "Batman Begins"), warns us "watch carefully" as the action begins. Set in the time when the rivalry of stage magicians was front page news, former partners try to best each other with increasingly difficult tricks (made deadly by the revenge-seeking magicians sabatoging each other's props).
3 pieces of trick-filled toast


Marie Antoinette (R)
Kirsten Duntz, Jason Schwartzman,
Directed by: Sofia Coppola
Duntz is a delight as the child-queen, but Schwartzman cast as the king is reminiscent of the inappropriate giggles Tom Hulce made while playing Mozart in "Amadeus." This loooong film is sumptuous, elegant, beautifully costumed, but ultimately, as Ms Coppola (who wrote the screenplay) has one character say about the Royal wedding night, "Nothing happened. "
2 pieces of why-did-she-cast-him? toast


Flicka (PG)
Alison Lohman, Maria Bello, Tim McGraw
Directed by: Michael Mayer
Advertised as the best horse-and-kid movie since the "Black Stallion" (25 years ago) is misleading. (See note below) Based upon the beloved Mary O'Hara novel "My Friend Flicka," they have transformed the boy (played by Roddy McDowell in the superior 1943 version) into a girl who gets writer's block and so has to leave her expensive private school to come home to her family's Wyoming horse ranch where a wild mustang saves her from a mountain lion. Phew.
NOTE: Even though the "Horse Whisperer" (1998) begins with a horrific truck/horse accident that cripples girl and horse, it's grittiness (and Robert Redford's direction) make it a far superior film for kids who are old enough. That same year, "Second Chances" has an injured girl nursed back to health through the love of a horse (or two). Both are several hands above "Flicka."
2 and 1/2 pieces of why not cast a real 16-year-old? toast


The Queen (PG-13)
Helen Mirren, Michael Sheen, James Cromwell, Sylvia Syms, Helen McCrory
Directed by: Stephen Frears
At first it seems odd that the director of "High Fidelity," "Mrs. Henderson Presents," and "Sammy and Rosie Get Laid" could create such a warm and likable film about Queen Elizabeth II, but let's not forget Helen Mirren's influence in all of this. Immediately following the death of ex-Princess Diana, the Queen mum seems unconcerned. "It's a private matter," she tells Tony Blair, but soon, events take center stage. The film and the star are Oscar-worthy. (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
4 pieces of Oscar quality toast


NEW on VIDEO & DVD

The Break-Up (PG-13)
Jennifer Aniston, Vince Vaughn, Joey Lauren Adams
Directed by Peyton Reed
Box Office: $118,683,135
Aniston and Vaughn are said to have fallen in love during the filming of this movie--but I can't see why. Based on the roles they play, they should have only learned negative things about each other. This Bickersons redoux grows tiresome fast.
1 and 1/2 pieces of bickering toast


Over the Hedge (PG)
Voices of: Bruce Willis, Steven Carrell, Garry Shandling, William Shatner, Alison Janney. Catherine O'Hara, Eugene Levy
Directed by Tim Johnson, Karey Kirkpatrick
Box Office: $155,019,340
A hyperactive squirrel, a raccoon con-artist and other hibernating animals wake to discover a green thing called "The Hedge" has sprung up between their homeland and a smelly, noisy, people-infested land called Suburbia. William Shatner as the possum, and Catherine O'Hara and Eugene Levy as the porcupine couple are worth the price of admission themselves.
3 pieces of brightly animated toast

Gil Mansergh's Cinema Toast
NEW RELEASES 10/13/06

Man of the Year (PG-13)
Robin Williams, Christopher Walken, Laura Linney
Directed by: Barry Levinson
Instead of reaching for comedic gold, the film makers decided to turn this into a failed dramatic thriller. Robin Williams signed himself into an alcoholic's rehabilitation center after the film was finished and it shows on film. Jon Stewart, he's not.
1 and 1/2 pieces of mixed message toast


Infamous (R)
Toby Jones, Sandra Bullock, Daniel Craig, Peter Bogdanovich, Jeff Daniels
Directed by: Douglas McGrath
Toby Jones attempt comes off as a caricature when compared to Phillip Seymour Hoffman's Oscar-winning portrayal of Truman Capote's feyness. Studded with A-list stars, this movie is built on gossip. Gossip and an undocumented tryst between Capote and one of the murderers. (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
2 pieces of why-did-they make-this? toast


The Last King of Scotland (R)
Forest Whitaker, James McAvoy, Kerry Washington, Gillian Anderson
Directed by: Kevin MacDonald
A writing acquaintance of mine was working for UNICEF in Uganda when Idi Amin rose to power. She told me that after herding all the foreign nationals into a barbed wire encircled camp, the "President for Life" made a tour of the facilities. "That was the only day in eight months of confinement that pieces of ground meat were served in the maize soup. 'Am I not a kind man?' he asked us. And of course we answered yes sir, very kind." Forest Whitaker has captured the mercurial evil of this madman in an Oscar-worthy performance. (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
4 pieces of megalomaniac toast


Shortbus (NR)
Sook-Yin Lee, Paul Dawson, Lindsay Beamish, PJ DeBoy, Raphael Barker, Jay Brannan, Peter Stickles, and Justin Bond
Directed by: John Cameron Mitchell
The star and director of "Hedwig and the Angry Inch" says "I wanted to use the language of sex as a metaphor for other aspects of the character's lives." He also had his cast of amateurs help create (perhaps choreograph is a better word) many of the voyeur-sex couplings set in an underground New York sex club. Metaphor anyone? (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
3 pieces of explicitly unemotional toast.


The Marine (PG-13)
John Cena, Kelly Carlson, Robert Patrick
Directed by: John Bonito
WWE Wrestling says "Having successfully submerged itself in the world of television and generated a host of superstar talent, WWE is ideally positioned to bring its unique and powerful cultural sensibility to the motion picture industry. "
Wrestler John Cena says: "My character in "The Marine," John Triton, fights for his country - and loves doing so. He has a good wife, and he's really focused on family. He's a down-to-earth, grounded guy."
Not available for preview



NEW on VIDEO & DVD

Prairie Home Companion (PG-13)
Woody Harrelson, Tommy Lee Jones, Garrison Keillor, Kevin Kline, Lindsay Lohan
Directed by: Robert Altman
Box Office: $20,172,050
On a rainy Saturday night in St. Paul, Minnesota, fans file into the Fitzgerald Theater to see 'A Prairie Home Companion,' a staple of radio station WLT, not knowing that WLT has been sold to a Texas conglomerate and that tonight's show will be the last.
3 pieces of Minnesota humor toast

Click (PG-13)
Adam Sandler, Kate Beckinsale, Christopher Walken
Directed by Frank Coaraci
Box Office $137,340,146
Overworked architect receives the master remote control from a strange character in the back room of a Bed, Bath & Beyond, and then tries it out in overly simplistic ways only to learn a valuable lesson from the experience. Based upon the redoux themes of "A Christmas Carol" or "It's a Wonderful Life" it will never be confused with those classics because, well, there's lots of humor about the gaseous emissions formed as byproducts of digestion "don't say you weren't warned.
1 and 1/2 pieces of Adam Sandler turned sappy toast

THANK YOU FOR NOT SMOKING
by
Gil Mansergh


Aaron Eckhart plays Nick Naylor, an unrepentant lobbyist for "Big Tobacco" in Jason Reitman's premiere film "Thank You For Smoking." Narrating the film, Naylor labels himself as the guy in college who could pick up any girl and sailed through classes using his debater's mindset--the ability to glibly argue either side of an issue. As the champion of farmers (of tobacco), free enterprise (tobacco companies), and just plain folks (smokers), "Freedom of choice" is Naylor's mantra.

Did I mention that the movie is a satire? Not only that, it's an intelligent and very funny satire.

Nick and his fellow "Merchants of Death" " (the self-dubbed MOD Squad) " gather weekly to drink, commiserate and swap strategies. Maria Bello shills for Alcohol while David Koechner is the verbal gunslinger for Firearms. None of the three feel that what they do is unseemly, unethical or immoral. In the voice over, Naylor cites what he calls "the yuppie Nuremberg defense, 'I just need to pay the mortgage."

"Actually I have a mortgage and I pay rent," Naylor tells a comely young reporter (Katie Holmes). "My son, my ex-wife and her boyfriend live in my house and I rent an apartment." The reporter turns out to have a similar level of ethics--she quickly invites herself to Nick's apartment to have sex and get some candid facts for her newspaper story.

Watching old movies with his son Joey (Cameron Bright), Naylor notices how John Wayne passes a pack of cigarettes around the foxhole just before a sniper shoots him in "Sands of Iwo Jima" The next day, Naylor pitches the idea of paying Hollywood movies to have their stars smoke on-screen. With the patriarch of Big Tobacco (Robert Duvall) offering his blessing, Nick and Joey take off for Hollywood to meet with a Japanese-obsessed super agent (Rob Lowe) who runs a company called EGO. Lowe almost steals the picture as he describes his concept of a science fiction film where Brad Pitt and Catherine Zeta-Jones make love while weightless in a space station. "We could have Pitt blow smoke rings to encircle her nude form," the agent suggests. "I'd pay to see that," Naylor admits.

As you can see, "Big Tobacco" is not the only entity satirized in the film. Other "Big Targets" include congress, advertising, Hollywood, nonprofits, television talk shows, the media, elementary schools, airlines, and..... One sub plot involves a threat Naylor receives on air during the Dennis Miller talk show. "We're going to kill you," says the voice and Miller segues into a commercial with the line: "We'll be right back, I have to fire a call screener."

The caller tries to make good on his threat, kidnapping Naylor in sight of the Congressional dome and then cutting off his pants and shirt. "What are you doing?" Naylor worries. "Nicotine patches," the kidnapper replies. Then he proceeds to read aloud all the dangerous side effects that can be caused by a nicotine overdose as others in the van slap patch after patch on Naylor's bare skin.

Don't worry that I've told you so many of the funny bits that the film will be ruined. There's much more going on. The fact that Reitman manages to keep all these sub plots and stories from overwhelming the movie is largely due to Aaron Eckhart's' firm-jawed performance. He holds his own with scene stealers like Rob Lowe and Robert Duvall and William H. Macy. But best of all may be the truly great scene between Eckhart and Sam Elliott as the ailing Marlboro Man. There's a briefcase full of hundred-dollar bills, a confession about never actually smoking Marlboros, and a Mephistophelian verbal battle that is worth watching again and again.

And, a true rarity in most of the films released this time of year, I really liked this movie's ending. It's to Reitman's credit (and perhaps the nature/nurture combo of bring the son of writer-director Ivan Reitman ("Ghostbusters") that the ending works so well and Naylor remains the best at what he does.

comments? E-mail gilmansergh@comcast.net
Hear Gil's Cinema Toast radio show7:30 Thursday mornings on KRSH-FM 95.9

Gil Mansergh's Cinema Toast
NEW RELEASES 10/6/06

NOTE: Three Oscar-worthy films open nationally on Friday, but you will have to wait a week for a Sonoma County venue for Forrest Whitaker's searing portrait of Idi Amin in "The Last King of Scotland," and another week for Helen Mirren's touching depiction of Britain's Elizabeth II in "The Queen." They are worth the wait.

The Departed (R)
Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Jack Nicholson, Alec Baldwin, Ray Winstone Marc Wahlberg
Directed by: Martin Scorcese
Nobody does inside gangsterland movies better and the deep-cover moles and bad cops add flavor to the mix. This one's set in Boston where a talented ensemble of young actors do some of their best work as they try to figure out who is watching who, who is with 'em or against 'em, why a much bragged about three-way with Jack and two females got filmed and immediately cut, and who is gonna be dead next?
4 pieces of Scorcese in Boston toast

Employee of the Month (PG-13)
Jessica Simpson, Dane Cook, Dax Shepard
Directed by: Greg Coolidge
Their photos are boldly posted on wall in the big box store staff lounge, but there has to be more to these people than the fact they stayed at the job long enough to be placed in a frame. No matter, the "hot" new cashier (the studio's label, not mine) is rumored to only date EoMs, so this month, the award may offer something besides a parking space close to the front door.
Not available for preview

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
Gil doesn't screen slasher films.


Keeping Mum (R)
Rowan Atkinson, Kristin Scott Thomas, Maggie Smith,Patrick Swayze
Directed by: Niall Johnson
A clueless vicar and his bored wife find ways to cope with the slow pace of life in a small British town, but when Grace, their housekeeper, serves some troubling news with the tea, we suddenly find ourselves in an ultra-dark comedy. (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
3 pieces of Earl Gray toast


Al Franken: God Spoke (NR)
Al Franken, Sean Hannity, Henry Kissinger, Michael Moore, Bill O'Reilly
Directed by: Nicholas Doob
The documentarians who did "The War Room," followed this former Saturday Night Live comedian for two years to record his sporadically amusing public feuding with Right Wing pundits. The result is like a SNL skit "funny in tiny bits, boring in the larger sections where it goes on too long because nobody knows when to say "cut." (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
2 pieces of 15-minutes of fame toast


Riding Alone for Thousands of Miles (PG)
Ken Takakura, Qiu Lin, Li Jiamin, Shinobu Terajima, Kiichi Nakai
Directed by: Zhang Yimou
When he learns his son is ill, a Japanese fisherman who hasn't seen his boy in a decade, visits and tries to mend fences, but the son refuse to see his father. The daughter-in-law suggests a way for the two to connect, but it involves a long and complex journey to the Chinese countryside. In Chinese with English Subtitles (At the Rialto in Santa Rosa)
3 pieces of poignant toast.

The US vs John Lennon (PG-13)
John Lennon, Yoko Ono, Walter Cronkite, Noam Chomsky, Tom Smothers
Directed by: David Leaf, Jon Scheinfeld
John Dean (of Nixon fame) makes it clear that the antiwar polemics of this former Beatle warranted the all-out FBI investigation that resulted in a file cabinet full of information but at least he sounds apologetic. In Contrast, G. Gordon Liddy still maintains that the investigation was in the strategic interest of the US. This documentary (made with strong editorial input from Yoko Ono), has a tendency to anoint Lennon with saintliness and ignore any seamy pstuff, but it clearly displays the dangers of a paranoid and secretive government. (At the 3rd Street Cinema 6 in Santa Rosa)
3 pieces of then-and-now toast.





NEW on VIDEO & DVD

Thank You For Smoking (NR)
Aaron Eckhart, Robert Duvall, Katie Holmes, William H. Macy, Sam Elliott, Chad Lowe
Directed by Jason Reitman
Box Office: $24,627,629
Aaron Eckhart plays Nick Naylor, an unrepentant lobbyist for "Big Tobacco." Nick and his fellow "Merchants of Death" " (the self-dubbed MOD Squad) " gather weekly to drink, commiserate and swap strategies. Maria Bello shills for Alcohol while David Koechner is the verbal gunslinger for Firearms. None of the three feel that what they do is unseemly, unethical or immoral. In the voice over, Naylor cites what he calls "the yuppie Nuremberg defense, 'I just need to pay the mortgage'."
Did I mention that the movie is a satire? Not only that, it's an intelligent and very funny satire.
3 and 1/2 pieces of satirical toast